What do you do when...........

your four year old tells you, "I'm going to kick your butt lady!!"? Do you laugh with him about it or kick HIS butt and cry with him as you wonder how your four year old thinks he can possible get away with kicking your butt and calling you lady?? If you know Kanton you know what a kick he is. If you don't know Kanton, you are missing out on some seriously hilarious stuff....maddening sometimes, but hi-lar-i-ous.

A few weeks ago Kanton called Stockton stupid so I told him I didn't want him to call people that anymore. He said "NO MOM!!! Just stop hearing me!" I guess a Family Home Evening about name calling is in order here at the Turley home.

Kanton's goofy stance with his goofy face on

Another thing you know if you know Kanton well is that he goes to the bathroom ALL.DAY.LONG. I feel sorry for his primary teachers because I'm sure they have to take him all the time. It's not the kind you can just send him in to do by himself either. It's the kind you send him in to do and a few minutes later he says "Mom! I'm D-O-N-E!!!" That is my cue to go in and help finish the job up, if you know what I mean. Well one Sunday after church we had a conversation after I realized I hadn't made him go to the bathroom before he went to church....

ME: Hey, Kanton...did you have to go to the bathroom at church today?

KANTON: Um, yep!

ME: (feeling sorry for the teacher that had to "help") Who helped you or did you go by yourself?

KANTON: (thinking for awhile and then had a very pleased look on his face) Joseph Smith!!!!

That got a good laugh out of all of us! I don't know if they were learning about Joseph Smith or if he thought his teacher who is Brother Smith was named Joseph. Funny stuff!

Kanton can be found outside peeing at any time of the day.....like when the UPS man comes to deliver and Kanton is standing on the front porch letting it go...what a greeting! Or when Stockton is standing down wind from him on a very windy day and gets "hosed" down. Or when he stands up to the toilet to go and, OOPS!, forgets to pull his underwear down and makes a large puddle for mom to clean up. I could go on and on and ON!!!

Luckily Kanton doesn't wet the bed. This is a good thing too because most nights he can be found in our bed laying between us sideways with a fist in Ray's face and a foot in mine. He gets kicked out about half way through the night when we can't take the beating anymore.

The other day I told Kanton to clean up the toy mess he had made in the living room. I kept asking him if he was still working on getting it picked up and finally he said "Mom, I don't want to. Can't you just send me up to my room all by myself to sit on my bed and think about it"?

I'm pretty sure he is terrified of my threats.